And the Waves Keep Crashing

I am away on my solo vacation on a beach in a southern state. It could not have come at a better time. Last week was very stressful - what with all the stalking and etc. All I could think of was driving away this morning and leaving it all behind me.

When you're feeling like this it is a great idea to go someplace where there is something bigger than you (like the ocean). I sat on the beach this afternoon. I felt fat and bloated and self-conscious.

Slowly, as the waves kept crashing, and the wind kept blowing those feelings dropped away from me. The waves don't care that you'd be happier losing 10 pounds. The wind doesn't care that you didn't do your hair or put on make up this morning.

I got up, sans cover up, and walked the beach. And the waves kept crashing. And the wind kept blowing. And the sun warmed my back. And I was sloshing through the water when I realized I was smiling.

This past year has been hard. I have made some good decisions, I have made some bad decisions. I have thrown away a lot of energy loving someone who clearly did not deserve it.

I kept walking. And the waves kept crashing. And the wind kept blowing. And I realized that every choice I have made in life has brought me here. And I am so happy right here that I wouldn't take back a single one. Not the dumb ones, not the smart ones, not the ones that ended up hurting me.

I turned around and walked towards my chair. And the waves kept crashing. And the wind kept blowing. And I felt myself (my soul?) stretch into those areas that have scared me so much about being alone. I could feel myself stretching and getting limber and strong for all the new journeys that are in front of me.

And the waves will keep crashing. And the wind will keep blowing. And I will continue to grow and stretch into myself.

Take care, dear readers.