Breaking Up is Hard to Do

I have to break up with someone this week.

But you're not dating? It isn't A, is it? - I can hear you thinking these things.

No, I'm not dating. No, I'm not breaking up with A (besides he leaves for Europe tomorrow - he doesn't really even have a chance to piss me off enough to break up with him this week - maybe next week though...).

I have to terminate someone's employment. Firing someone is really like a break up. There will likely be tears. There will be a demand for an explanation. And even if I do explain, the explanation will never be enough for the person being terminated. Every kindness we extend to this person will be viewed as "just rewards" for being treated so badly by the organization. The meeting will leave us both feeling sad, tired and a little more empty than when we went into it.

So, if it sucks this much, why do it? Because, like in a break up, it is the right thing to do for my organization (or in the case of a break up - for myself).

Also similar to a break up I hope that the person being terminated takes a look back and learns some lessons from the experience - no matter how difficult. I have, in the past week, had the opportunity to look back at my relationship with S with a clearer eye. I see my mistakes, I see my positives. I'm not naive enough to say I'll never repeat them again, but being able to analyze them clearly is a step towards avoiding the same mistakes in the future.

I hope the person I terminate will eventually look back at this experience and realize it helped her grow as a person.

Take care, dear readers. I'm off to break a heart.