A dear friend of mine emailed me last night worried about me after reading this blog. She was concerned that I was bearing too much of my soul on the open wasteland that is the internet. She was concerned that things I said would hurt my ex-husband. She was worried about my safety. I appreciate all her concerns.
Please know, dear readers, that this blog contains my deepest and inner most thoughts - if that is something you cannot handle to read, please take a break from reading this blog for a couple weeks. I need this outlet for my inner voice - the one I am trying to heed. Writing here gives that voice a creative outlet and has helped to make it stronger. Your comments and emails have helped encourage this voice as well.
And please don't worry about me. Just because I am going through some hard times does not mean I am not the same strong person you have always known. I am just growing, becoming stronger, more sure of myself and more sure of what I want out of my life. This is all a good thing, but no growth comes without pain. And I have shared, in these pages, my pain.
As for her concerns about hurting my ex-husband - I don't want to hurt him unnecessarily and will strive to keep from doing so. However, most of what has already been written in this blog is stuff that he knows or should have known.
So, dear readers - this has been my first test. I am doing something that is not meeting the approval of one of my dear friends. The old me would have gone back and erased the post that bothered her (Elephant in the Room). The new me stands behind that post. That post was difficult to write, difficult to publish and difficult to read. I am proud that I have faced down that demon (and continue to face it down). I am proud of my progress. I am proud of the me I am becoming and I will not hide the process because it disturbs some people.
I hope you understand, dear reader. And if you do not, please come back in a couple weeks to see if I've gone back to reviewing restaurants. You can't keep restaurant hound down forever!
Take care of yourself. I'll be taking care of me...
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3 comments:
YES!!
Thank you for your encouragement, anonymous...
Interestingly, every time I come back to read my blog I am tempted to erase "Elephant in the Room." And every time I decide to keep it. It was an authentic and real post at the time it was posted. So I keep it - even 4 years later when things are not as dark as they were. It reminds me of a place I visited but to which I never want to return.
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