For the last several years I have been practicing escapism at it's finest. I drank, I ate, I hung out with friends. I did everything I could do to avoid looking at the reality of my life and how profoundly unhappy I was.
One of my favorite things to do was to get a glossy fashion magazine, a glass of wine and sit on the back porch listening to old songs from the 40's. In my head I traveled to a place where I was beautiful, sought after, wearing designer clothes, perfect make up, perfect hair, etc. Part of me believed if I could buy these things - get the latest shoe, bag, make up, pants, dress, etc. that my life would be better. I subscribed to well over 10 magazines to either escort me into this fantasy land or show me the next thing I needed to buy. Obviously that did not work. Eventually I had to confront my life.
And I have. I have confronted my life and am moving forward. I feel like I've done 10 years worth of growing up in 6 months. I'm ready (and excited) about tackling the responsibility of home ownership. I'm looking forward to mowing my own lawn, to planting some flowers, to painting (my ex-husband would really laugh at all of this).
But what about those magazines? I have noticed that they keep piling up. And piling up. I have no desire to look at them any more. They have nothing to offer me. I don't need to escape any more - the right here and now is good enough for me.
Take care, dear reader.
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